I found this post hidden in my drafts, started the week Reagan was injured. It is just the ramblings of a mom hurting for her child.
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Tonight I am dragging. I want to cry but need to keep my composure. It almost feels like throwing a tantrum would ease some of what is building inside of me. Life isn't fair and this is no big surprise but why? 

I am mad. 

I am sad. 

I am fearful. 

I am plagued with concern. 

I turn to God. 

I trust God.

It's just a torn ACL I tell myself. Something that is corrected everyday in this country. Something that athletes recover from every year. But it's not JUST A TORN ACL, it's so much more. 

It seemed that Reagan was on the fast track to a college scholarship to play soccer at a D1 school in a power 5 conference. And from there her goals include the national team and playing professional soccer one day. Lofty goals for a 16 year old but it's actually been her plan since she was 7 years old. Now we don't know if there will be athletic money for Reagan. College coaches are pulling away from her.

Reagan isn't completely defined by soccer but it is a key ingredient. Taking soccer away from Reagan for the next 9 months is heart wrenching to watch. Soccer isn't just an activity for our daughter. It's her workout . stress reliever . fun . endorphin producer . friends . challenge . vacations and sometimes her identity. Reagan is a sister, daughter, friend, student, leader, christian, goof-ball, introvert, thinker and button pusher but without soccer there is a hole. It's that hole that makes a mama's heart ache. 

Reagan had surgery on November 14th and started physical therapy 3 days later. She has had good days and hard days...there are more of both yet to come. I have never seen a girl with such a desire and drive to overcome. We are proud of you Reags. Keep working hard and trusting that God has a great plan for your life. 

The Injury 10.14.17

The Surgery 11.14.17

The Road to Recovery 11.15.17

Give Thanks with A Grateful Heart

Each November I create some kind of gratitude list. This year my plan was to post on instangram an unplanned picture each day that represented something of my everyday life that I'm thankful for. Honestly, I was not as consistent as I hoped to be. The thing is I began to recognize the most simplistic items and events of my day that I am truly thankful for. Being happy and grateful is a decision. A decision to recognize my blessings rather than focus on my wants and needs.

Every thanksgiving day we hang out with my husband's family in Omaha. Many years my parents have joined us but with dad in the nursing home and mom in Texas, it wasn't possible to have them with us. All too often I hear people complain about family. We look forward to spending holidays with our family especially at Thanksgiving. This year I experienced a first. Once Emma came home from college I felt completely content. We still did the big gathering but I could have been just as happy having my family of five around me for the day.

Sixty degrees and Thankful!

Veterans and Chris

Happy Veteran's Day

and

Happy Birthday to My Guy

I love you Babe!

Today I wish a very happy birthday to the father of my children and love of my life. This handsome hubby got a little cheated today as we have one sick and one almost getting sick kiddo at home. Our plans were to eat out, go to the Curling Olympic Trials and the movie Thor. Instead we ate out twice and came home for some R&R.

Every year Chris picks a new hamburger joint for the family birthday celebration. This year we went to Louie M's in east Omaha, not an area we frequent. This establishment has been around for 37 years. It's a real family business, owner Lou and his 2 adult sons were there, father and son cooks were in the kitchen, a family combo works there and their head waitress has been working at Louie M's for 25 years. Sounds like a great business. I loved the history of the place. My hamburger was good but it didn't compare with Stella's in Bellevue.

Louie M's Burger Lust

This picture just isn't quite right. Again, it's odd to celebrate without Emma. Being the sweet daughter that she is, both Chris and I got to facetime Em tonight. I cherish hearing about her week. Her exciting news was learning to shoot a shot gun. Never a dull moment!

Move This Mountain

This past year our family has had an unusual amount of challenging issues and I can't help but wonder why. Typically when I ask God "why are we dealing with x, y, z?" I am really complaining about my discomfort and looking for answers that will soothe me. What if it's not about me? While it is probable that God has something to teach me, it may also be about someone else. 

If God has brought me to it, He's going to help me through it! 

Today I choose joy! I will face each challenge with the wisdom that God loves me and has great plans for me. I can be an inspiration to others and a light to the world when I focus on God as my strength. 

Happy Halloween!

Fall in Nebraska can be fantastic or ridiculously cold. Handing out candy to cute little kids coming to my door bundled up battling the snow on halloween just doesn't seem right. My little kiddos had their own Halloween fun. Olivia trick or treated with her BFF Makayla. Reagan had her squad over for dinner, pictures and laughs. While Emma hung out in her dorm room watching Netflix.

Reagan's Squad

Stephen Curry . The Purge Scary girl . Lifeguard . Pig in A Blanket

The Purge Scary guy . Sister Grace . Chill Dude (whatever that is)

Olivia

A Box of Nerds